the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
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