I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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