I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
