I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
