I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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