Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
