So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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