My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
