Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Panties = found
Randomize