i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
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