the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Your cock deserves a montage
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
