He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
