his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
