babies were throwing up all over the place
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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