i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
