Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize