I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
