My first STD was from a foam party
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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