You're completely useless in the revolution.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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