It's just like the Real World with babies
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
