So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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