i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize
