So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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