In the future we'll all be gay
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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