Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Fuck appropriateness.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
