I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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