my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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