your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
