I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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