There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
