one two three fourrrrnication!
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
