What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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