How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
