Grow some girl-balls and come out already
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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