Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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