How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
