Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
should my penis look like a turkey
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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