The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
