i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
