i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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