Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
