I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
