Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
