so explain again why im purple
no
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
We have started to decorate penises.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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