you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize