I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
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