Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
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