It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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