He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
