3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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